Sunday, September 02, 2007

College is cruel

I just think that college is cruel in the way it's always changing. I kind of feel like I've been jolted about over the last four months. It frustrates me not having control over what stays consistent in my life and what changes. I completely uprooted myself at the end of winter, which was a great decision, and moved into Applewood. I had great roommates--one of which moved out at the end of spring. I became really good friends with Christie and then she left for Jerusalem. I threw myself into work (a crazy amount of work) and became good friends with my co-worker Christina, and tomorrow she leaves for four months for Romania. Christie comes back tomorrow. I moved out of Applewood into Alpine Court and went through a slightly hellish moving process. I just feel like I settle into routines so easily and then they are so easily uprooted. Just this week I got really used to it just being me and Michelle at my apartment. I went to work and came home to her reading. I hung out with Christina, spent a lot of nights at Roman Gardens. And it felt like a lasting routine. However, of course, Tuesday a whole new routine will start filled with a different people. And it will change again in Winter--or sooner. Tomorrow just feels like a linking day between routines. A non-day. I don't really know what to do with myself. I just want something consistent to hold onto so I don't feel so frantic as people shift in and out of my life.


Lil Renny said...

Yeah, I got used to the smallness of my new ward for summer, then yesterday there were so many new people that I didn't even know what to do, so I just got tired and depressed. College... fun, but ever changing. I'm glad we had a breakfast bash today, and that you came. Consistency. I appreciated it.

Chelsea said...

Sorry if my email threw you for a loop since I just sort of stepped right back into your life. You can just think of it as a blog post - just one that no one else got to read!

This is an interesting post because I have often thought about how much I thrive on change. I need it and love it. I guess I haven't had any bad changes, so that is why I can say that. But I so love moving somewhere new and getting a fresh start where nobody knows me and I don't know anyone. It's so refreshing because I tend towards getting stuck in ruts. I should probably have just written a blog post about this, instead of a very verbose comment.

Lil Renny said...

So Chelm, your email would be considered another element of change in her life... Life does move forward huh? Crazy. I guess I don't hate change, but at first I'm always like, whoa! I don't know what to do with myself. Then it seems that once I figure that out, everything changes again. I guess its good, but a little frustrating.