Sunday, February 05, 2012

Entertainment Ennui

Last night at 10:30 I was sitting at my computer browsing my parents' Netflix subscription. Oddly, I wanted a break from TV and desperately wanted to watch a good movie. By good, I mean something mindless with beautiful people, or fashionable clothes, or, at the very least, something I hadn't seen before. I scanned through the romance and comedy genres and clicked through Starz Play. The same four movies kept showing up over and over: Notting Hill, Never Been Kissed, Morning Glory, and You Again. Not in the mood, too dated, I hate Diane Keaton, and not worth seeing again.

When a classic like Notting Hill doesn't sound appealing, I know it's going to be impossible to settle on a movie that I'll actually finish. It's impossible because when I'm in a restless viewing mood what I really want to watch is a magical romantic comedy starring Meg Ryan at her You've Got Mail prime, present-day Adam Scott, and present-day Ginnifer Goodwin all dressed like they work at a fashion magazine (Gossip Girl/Devil Wears Prada style) with supporting roles by present-day John Krasinski, any-time-in-her-career Amy Poehler, and Good Will Hunting Matt Damon with a screenplay written by Nora Ephron and Tina Fey. Since this movie doesn't exist (devastating), I had to settle on watching Disney's Prom.

Prom is a compelling tale of the four weeks leading up to high school prom. It stars Julie from Friday Night Lights as class president/AP star/prom organizer, a long-haired bad boy (think Heath Ledger in 10 Things I hate About You) as her unexpected(?) love interest, a perfect-and-overachieving-but-insensitive boy (think Freddie Prince Jr. in She's All That minus the mid-movie change of heart) as her flakey initial prom date, an awkward Neville Longbottom character as the token nerd who can't find a date, and a freshman Bieber-meets-Efron character who doesn't really have any place in the movie. Julie desperately wants Freddie Prince to ask her to prom. After all, they have been in AP classes and on student council together for as long as she can remember. They're MFEO. He asks her in an insultingly casual way (want to carpool to prom?) and then cancels last minute. Two weeks before prom, all the prom decorations burn in a fire (it really sounds like I'm making that up, doesn't it?), and bad boy's punishment for being a ruffian is to help Julie make new decorations. They work together, they fall in love, he has a heart, he gets cold feet because he thinks she's too good for him, but then he surprises her on prom night (gasp!). Neville takes his sister. Bieber-meets-Efron wins over a Selena Gomez sophomore by flipping his bangs. All-in-all it was thoroughly what I expected: a mediocre Disney take on the classic teen romance genre that was just half a step above Disney made-for-TV movies like Brink or Double Teamed. And yes, if I'm to be completely honest, I watched the whole thing.

And I could continue making fun of Prom to thoroughly convince you that I hated it and don't like watching cheesy, low-quality movies. Or, I could use the movie as a springboard to talk about my own prom experience in my purple dress with my date, Ben. But I'm not going to do either because I do like watching cheesy, low-quality movies, and my prom experience was super boring. Except the part where I almost vomited from the sideways ride in the limo.

3 comments:

Josephine said...

We almost went to see prom in the theater. It was this past summer when we saw lots of movies and we just never made it, but boy did we netflix it. Loved that there was a FIRE. And a meddling father. I think my favorite was that prom queen went by herself. Oh prom. I never went, so I'm glad the prom movie genre exists (I'm thinking high school movies here because most of them climax with prom in some way, right?) so I know exactly what I missed.

Unknown said...

I read this blog called gofugyourself.com and sometimes they write about horrible movies that they watched and all I do the entire time is die laughing, and then I am grateful that I never have to see those movies. This is how I know the storyline from "Country Strong" and "The Last Song."

I feel this movie could fall into that category. I also laughed very hard at this post, so maybe you should submit it to them.

Elisa said...

The Blockbuster by my apartment is going out of business, so they're selling all their DVDs and blu-rays for, like, two bucks. I've maybe been three times in two weeks. I maybe bought Prom.